Atlas Shrugged: The Mocking

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Where Are Pirates When You Need Them?

It seems that the recession has affected even the upper middle class, for there are still cabins available on the National Review Cruise.

Portugal. May. Riverboat. Political Panels. NR. Your Kind of a Vacation! Sign Up Now! [Jack Fowler]

Imagine three nights at a five-star Lisbon hotel, followed by a seven-night luxury sailing on the glorious Douro River (May 12 – 22). All the while you’re touring the beautiful countryside. And in between the fine dining and relaxing receptions, you’re enjoying numerous panel sessions discussing current events. Imagine

figuring out the 2010 elections with Dick Morris,
and with Ralph Reed,
discussing the administration’s 10-thumbed Middle East policy with former Commentary editor Norman Podhoretz,
and its jaw-dropping treatment of terrorists with former Attorney General Michael Mukasey,
exploring the state of Americas culture with acclaimed author and social critic Midge Decter,
and the state of conservatism with Wall Street Journal columnist Bill McGurn,
as well as National Review Institute president Kate O’Beirne,
discovering just how statist the EU is with European parliament member and Tory star Dan Hannan,
judging our military prospects in Afghanistan with Bing West,
dissecting major domestic and social trends with National Review Online Editor-at-large Kathryn Lopez,
and just how biased our media has become with National Review Deputy Managing Editor Kevin Williamson.
There are still cabins available — one for you, because face it: you just don’t want to miss this trip. (Did you know we cut cabin prices by $2,000?!) You can sign up immediately (and get complete information about all the wonderful excursions awaiting you) at

Be still my heart--Kathryn Jean Lopez is available for cocktail chatter! Or you can go toe-to-toe with Dick Morris, or discuss culture with Midge Dector, who can relate what it was like to live through the first Depression. The only thing missing is the presence of Jonah Goldberg in the bar, holding court with a brandy in one hand and a cigar in another, like one of the barnyard animals attending cocktail parties in a New Yorker cartoon.

Minorities need not apply, as poor Norman Podhoretz is easily frightened.


M. Bouffant said...

Not only the discount, but it's doubtful a riverboat has anywhere near the number of cabins that were available for last yr.'s NR Mediterranean cruise.

And the reactionary cruising crowd may be getting too old to go on a cruise.

bulbul said...

Europe? They're going to EUROPE? Don't get me wrong, we'd be happy to take their money, but seriously, how unpatriotic of them.

Susan of Texas said...

Spain and Portugal. Don't tell them about the Moors. Their brains would short circuit.

M. B.--yes, I've seen those. They're very small compared to cruise ships. Can you imagine all these jokers in Spain or Portugal, being the minority instead of the majority? They'll skedaddle back to the boat faster than Sarah Palin running from her first semester of college in Hawaii.

Clever Pseudonym said...

I watched a documentary a while back where a guy who had been declared clinically dead and then brought back described his out-of-body experience as the exact opposite of that soothing light and peace everyone always talks about. He thought he had a glimpse of hell - people clawing at him, screaming in agony, and an otherwise all-around frightening experience.

That's what I imagine it would be like to go on an NRO cruise. I'd probably wind up jumping overboard.

ohsopolite said...

If the NR cruise had existed in Dante's day, hell would have 11 circles.

Anonymous said...

"Toe to toe" with Dick Morris is hilarious. Awesome...