Shorter Ross Douthat: Why should poor minorities get scholarships when poor whites, the salt of the earth and the defenders of our faith, do not?
Douthat wants to claim that cultural bigotry is keeping the poor out of the aristocracy. It's not income inequality, the result of out-of-control and unregulated capitalism. It's not the end of the American Dream of rising to a higher class. It's the university admissions offices, who are liberal and hate the poor and patriotic.
Ross Douthat Eats Breakfast:
Hmm, what do I feel like eating today? I could have oatmeal. That's conservatives. Good, hearty, heavy, oatmeal. But I hate oatmeal. I want French Toast. But that's French, and I hate the French because they envy us for our masculinity. No French Toast. Maybe doughnuts. That'll show the Nanny-staters. Lots of fatty doughnuts. But doughnuts are eaten by cops and cops are lower class. Maybe I could eat a cruller. That's higher class. What's more elite, a bear claw or a cruller? But the doughnut shop has doughnuts with rainbow sprinkles and that's gay and anything gay makes me extremely uncomfortable and gives me flashbacks of those times at my summer camp for young gentlemen of good family. I'll have eggs and toast. That's safe. Pastry is a liberal plot to corrupt American masculinity anyway.