Atlas Shrugged: The Mocking

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Like A Virgin: The Dinesh D'Souza Story

The future Mrs. Dinesh D'Souza holds her honey close to her heart. Or some place.
Photo from BuzzFeed.
Dinesh D'Souza has outed himself as a world-class wanker, something everyone already knows but D'Souza inexplicably thought he could hide in plain sight. And speaking of hiding things in places one should not, it seems married uber-Christian D'Souza was caught sleeping with a married woman in her late twenties while at a Christian conference.

The young lady in question, Denise Joseph, a right-wing blogger, married Dec. 30, 2011, but by September D'Souza was introducing her as his fiancee.  D'Souza said they met three months ago so it was truly a whirlwind courtship; from first meeting to fiancee in only two months. However a former D'Souza staffer at The King's College, where D'Souza was president until the scandal hit, begged to differ with D'Souza's account. The Daily Beast says that Joseph has been seen at the college since "early 2012":

A former student said people would ask about Joseph, whom he described as “pushy,” but would be met with “weird smiles” and evasive answers. That student said one of his friends, a staffer who worked closely with D’Souza, was tasked with creating an official response to the speculation, which was that she was “a good friend of Dinesh.” The student said staffers he knew believed Joseph made her presence known at the college because she wanted to be more than D’Souza’s “road tail.”

If this account is true Joseph was a newlywed when D'Souza scooped her up. D'Souza told the Evangelical magazine World, which broke the story, that Joseph was his fiance and they had spent the night together in his hotel room at the conference but that "nothing happened." He also told World that he and his wife were divorcing but he did not file for divorce until reporters started contacting him regarding this story. As the story grew and he was forced to resign his presidency, D'Souza "went on the attack," accusing the conferences organizer who witnessed D'Souza and Joseph get one hotel room together and the owner of World, as liars. He claims vendetta, since he had ended World vice president's editorial consultant contract with The King's College.

Christianity Today says:
"The approach in the article ... is a clear effort to destroy me and my career," D'Souza said. "To me, that is a kind of viciousness masquerading as righteousness. That's what makes this deplorable and sad."  
Smith said any speculation that World published its report as a vendetta against D'Souza and TKC is irresponsible.  
"It is simply not true," Smith said. "It's a story we did not pursue, but once we came across it, we made a pretty straightforward journalistic determination that this is a newsworthy story."  
Smith said conference organizers McFarland and Tony Beam observed D'Souza's "highly irregular" behavior and shared the information with Smith, who was speaking at the same event.
So the morals police at the evangelical conference in South Carolina ran tattling to World magazine because baby Jesus weeps every time a man sins, and a man who makes a living peddling hypocrisy is hoist in his own double standard. D'Souza now claims that Joseph did not share his room, the two did not sleep together, and for the life of him, D'Souza just can't imagine why any Christian would be upset by his actions anyway.

Denise and I were trying to do the right thing. I had no idea that it is considered wrong in Christian circles to be engaged prior to being divorced, even though in a state of separation and in divorce proceedings. Obviously I would not have introduced Denise as my fiancé at a Christian apologetics conference if I had thought or known I was doing something wrong. But as a result of all this, and to avoid even the appearance of impropriety, Denise and I have decided to suspend our engagement.

Obviously! Why on earth would anyone expect the religious right to get upset by the sight of D'Souza cohabiting with a young woman not his wife? It's not like they and D'Souza preach constantly about morality.

Why is Obama on the social issues — and I’m thinking here of abortion, I’m thinking here of gay marriage — why is Obama so aggressive in attacking the traditional values agenda? I think the reason for it is because when Obama thinks about colonialism, about the British and the French who went abroad to conquer other countries, or earlier the Spanish and the Portuguese, I come from a part of India that was a Portuguese colony at one time, I think for Obama colonialism is identified not just with the soldiers but also with the missionaries. Remember it’s the missionaries that went alongside the conquerors, the conquistadors, came to the Americas and worked on converting the Indians and later missionaries went to China, India and Japan. So I think this is the problem, Obama doesn’t like traditional Christianity because he identifies it with colonialism. Obama’s own Christianity is more of a Third World liberation theology, a very different kind of Jeremiah Wright type philosophy, summarized in the idea that America is the rogue nation in the world.

Oh, wait. They do. Especially when they can make lots of money by lecturing about Obama's so-called anti-Christian beliefs and actions.

Happily, the future looks bright for the new couple, since the young lady is every bit as hypocritical as her paramour. Right Wing Watch helpfully excerpted a portion of Joseph's now-invisible personal blog, where she rails against those nasty liberals who are destroying marriage with infidelity.

In the 1960s and 1970s, feminists and liberals of other stripes started pointing out the hypocrisies of what they termed “patriarchy.” Time and again, they urged us to recognize human’s natural “animal instincts” in relation to traditional morality and therefore, to reject traditional institutions such as marriage as outdated because now these intellectual elites had things like biology and sociology, things like women’s studies, gender studies, and critical race theory, to back them up. They pointed to infidelity or infamous sexual desire surveys (conducted by homosexuals)[vi] among traditionally married couples to “prove” their theses. Limb by limb, they tore the traditional family to shreds until they reduced us to the shining bastion of zoological (but even animals aren’t this bad and do not depend on the state to care for them)cesspool equality that we have now in every American ghetto and which is seeping out into the middle and upper classes in less animated ways. These people, like their European counterparts, are the ones who will go extinct. For instance, we have raised an entire generation of boys who, permanently scarred by their parents’ divorces(perhaps over issues such as infidelity) cannot emotionally connect or commit to any one woman in any meaningful way and so we also have an entire generation of girls for whom that coveted diamond solitaire comes later and later in life, with more and more contractual caveats (prenups). Somehow, when it happens after 5 years of living together, after 1 year of non-exclusive dating followed by another 3 years of recurring breakups over the male’s unwillingness to “commit,” getting that ring for which you girls will surely be paying your hard-earned half, doesn’t feel quite like the fairytale it used to.

No doubt that coveted diamond solitaire will eventually make its way onto Joseph's finger, courtesy of millions of gullible right-wingers who buy D'Souza's products. And is there any doubt that it will be a much bigger diamond that that of the first (of many!) Mrs. Dinesh D'Souzas?


Hamish Mack said...

That man is a saint! Um, she was barely back from her honeymoon before she was hanging around D'Souza's office

Susan of Texas said...

Theirs is a forever love. Or at least until she finds another blogger to win on her way to fame and fortune. Fortunately she can only find someone who is an improvement when it comes to personal charms.

Mr. Wonderful said...

Time and again, they urged us to recognize human’s natural “animal instincts”

Uh-huh. Time and again. Does she have any citations for this? Can she provide one single quote in which a subject of her scorn uses the phrase "animal instincts" in the way she claims they frequently do?

Nah. She's too busy writing rich, beautiful prose about a "shining bastion of zoological...cesspool equality."

Anonymous said...

" I had no idea that it is considered wrong in Christian circles to be engaged prior to being divorced, even though in a state of separation and in divorce proceedings. Obviously I would not have introduced Denise as my fiancé at a Christian apologetics conference if I had thought or known I was doing something wrong.

That's the best part. He had no idea anyone would disapprove.


Downpuppy said...

My favorite parts are about Kings College. This place is seriously weird. It's about 10 years old, and was in the Empire State Building until this year. They have maybe 400 students (very cagy about that on their website) at leat half of whom take off in the first 2 years. They were paying D'Souza a million smackers a year. And he wasn't doing the job - running off working on his movie & foolery. Even these people, with SUCKER written in 60 pt neon type on their foreheads were ready to run him out of town on any or no excuse.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Wingnut welfare: wanking for a wivin'.

Clever Pseudonym said...

I wonder if this homewrecking bint ever considered that the reason divorce rates are so high is precisely because marriage is marketed as a fairy tale? Buy a ring priced 1000 times what it should actually be worth. Why shouldn't you go bankrupt throwing your wedding? It's the happiest day of your life! Marriage is no longer a lifelong comitment. It's a bloodsucking industry. But according to her, it's the feminists and other modern folks who think it's better to put the brakes on before "until death do us part" enters the picture or believe in a 50/50 partnership who have wrecked it. At any rate, she does strike me more as the type who cares more about how big a rock a guy will splurge for than any other trait a man might emotionally possess. These people are disgusting. Ordinarily, I'd insist their private live were nobody's business, but when you make a career out of finger-wagging,self-righteous moralizing while judging others, the skeletons in your closet are fair game.

Cole said...

Oh good lord, really?

Dinesh and Denise D'Souza?

Is this a joke?

Tommykey said...

I for one welcome Dinesh D'Souza to the ranks of the "cultural left". Now we can retroactively blame him for 9/11.

Susan of Texas said...

Thank you for that laugh, Cole.

Here's hoping that they have children, preferably named Dijon and D'Jour.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

I think someone over at Tengrain's place coined the perfect name for him: D'vorce D'spousa.

Dan Coyle said...

I think it's come out that D'Souza was paid more like 190K a year by King's College, which is still too much.

There's a great NYMAG piece from 2011 about The King's College and D'Souza where it seems, even back then, the faculty couldn't stand the nutcase.

Tommykey said...

I was gonna say, I'm an atheist but I would take the job for $150K.

Substance McGravitas said...

Dinesh and Denise D'Souza?

I feel shame for not noticing.

Downpuppy said...

At least we know DD won't start an advice column, since Megan is trying it, & Me Too!

Lurking Canadian said...

Divorce is a horrid sign of the way feminists are wrecking our society.

I mean, *other people's* divorces, of course. *My* divorce is about True Love, or something.

Wasn't D'Souza a Catholic once? Did he somehow miss the Church's views on divorce and adultery?

Anonymous said...

Well, just another example of the Republican "me" philosophy: "Rules for thee, but not for me," "It's all about me," and "Do as I say, but not as I do"...

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Ugh, I just pictured another right-wing film favorite, The Roots of D'Souza's Lust. I think I need to seduce a newlywed wingnette to assuage the mental trauma.

Downpuppy said...

One thing that's different with Meeegan at the Beast is that instead of a mass audience in her comments, she gets about 3 morons.

Anyhow, it got me thinking about why he have journalists at all, particularly in subjects where journalists are reliably clueless.

M. Bouffant said...

In the alliteration dep't., it should be noted that D.D.'s current (as of this typing) wife is named Dixie, & their daughter is named Danielle.

Duncan Mitchel said...

D'Souza's indignation reminds me of Anita Bryant's, back when she got her first divorce. That would have been around 1980 when the election of the divorced and remarried Ronald Reagan apparently caused certain teachings of Jesus to vanish from the gospels -- the ones about anyone who divorces a spouse and remarries another is an adulterer. Suddenly the evangelical Right stopped being concerned about divorce, except maybe for women, because Bryant took some heat for it.

I can't remember at this remove whether she tried to become President of the Southern Baptist Convention before or after the divorce, but in any case she was turned primarily because she is a woman, and Scripture says clearly that ladyparts are not to be put in authority of men. She then complained to the media about all these closed-minded biblical-literalist old men who were thumping their Bibles at her, and how dare they after all she'd done for Jesus! Some things don't change; Jesus was with us, yea, only a little while, but chutzpah endureth forever.